Are you more loving?

That was the question I had to confront myself with a few Sundays ago. My capacity to love others had been wearing thin and my love tank was almost empty! The past week or so I had been hiding out at home, not wanting to catch up with anyone, and one Sunday I escaped early from church to avoid having to fellowship with anyone! When I got home, I knew I had some inward issues to deal with so I forced myself to pick up one of the books I am reading, 10 questions to diagnose your spiritual health, by Donald S Whitney. I analysed each of the questions and realised that 4 out of the 10 relate to people! I was immediately drawn to read question no. 3 which is Are you more loving?. As I was reading this chapter, I started to feel immensely convicted. Heres a snippet.

The decline of love
When love grows colder, our sin increasingly manifests itself and we look more unlike Jesus. We lose patience easily, whereas 1 Corinthians 13:4 says that "Love suffers long." Unkindness becomes common, yet love "is kind". We become sinfully envious of the advantages and privileges of others, perhaps even of those within our own family; conversely, "love does not envy." When challenged about our lack of love, we quickly and quite confidently list all the sacrifices and other proofs of our love, and yet "love does not parade itself, is not puffed up." As our hearts harden against love, we become less courteous, especially to those closest to us, in contrast to love which "does not behave rudely" (1 Corinthians 13:5). We begin to consider ourselves and our "rights" as more important than others and their needs, whereas love "does not seek its own." When love is in decline we are more easily angered, but love "is not provoked." A lack of love is often faultfinding, and it mentally keeps score of offenses, but love "thinks no evil."

The word of God is so very convicting, so life changing! I had been struggling to give out anymore love, and yet when I examined my love in light of 1 Corinthians 13, I realised that it had been so full of self, so insincere. Love does not "seek its own" I had been seeking love in return, but God wants us to love selflessly, for His glory, not to get in return, not to puff ourselves up and get recognition. Whitney quotes from Maurice Roberts,

Why is real Christian love so scarce in the world? It is because its cultivation requires nothing less than the reversal of every instinct in our fallen natures. Love is against the grain of nature. It is every fiber of our being as sinners. But nature, in the regenerate, is under the higher power of grace....What the unregenertae cannot do, true Christians may and must.

Whitney exhorts us to Let your heart be often warmed by the fire of God's love. It always comes back to Him. To the cross. As a disciple of Jesus Christ I must constantly examine my love for His sake, for the eternal destiny of others. Jesus said that love is the clearest mark of a Christian.

A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; as I have loved you. By this all will know that you are my disciples if you have love for one another. John 13:34-35

God is the only one who can fill my love tank way past the fill line!

Just in case you are curious about what the other 9 questions to diagnose your spiritual health are, here they are!

1. Do you thirst for God?
2. Are you governed increasingly by God's word?
3. Are you more loving?
4. Are you more sensitive to God's presence?
5. Do you have a growing concern for the spiritual and temporal needs of others?
6. Do you delight in the bride of Christ?
7. Are the spiritual disciplines increasingly more important to you?
8. Do you still grieve over sin?
9. Are you a quick forgiver?
10. Do you yearn for heaven and to be with Jesus?